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Catholic goodbye of fiancés in our Catholic Hispanic culture has been been celebrated for many years. The traditional Catholic or Liturgical goodbye of fiancès is a unique tradition in its class, where the future fiancès and their respective families are united together to celebrate the union of the future spouses.
This celebration typically is full of blessings from friends and relatives where the blessing of God, prayers, songs, gifts, surprises and good intentions are the main ingredients of this gathering. In this celebration each gift has a meaning and each prayer has a good wish. In countries as Mexico, the Catholic goodbye of fiancès is essential so that the future marriage is full of good luck and blessings. This Catholic goodbye of fiancès does not have anything to do with the typical goodbyes as a single person. Normally this celebration is organized by the family of the fiancèe. Typically the mom along with the near family but of the future fiancèe are the ones who organize most of the event. A priest is not necessary for this celebration, although it is very common to see a priest involved.
The following is the order events for the goodbye:
To each guest and the fiancès one distributes two sheets of the songs. It is explained that as with other celebrations music is needed to acclimate itself. This liturgical goodbye also has songs. It is necessary to pay attention well as each phrase of the song has a message of LOVE for each one of the presents and for the future spouses. The songs are bundled with great advice.
This is a list of wishes and gifts for the fiancès in this Liturgical Catholic goodbye and the order of how they should be given:
1. The Crucifix (the mother of the fiancè must gift it)
2. Bible (the mother of the fiancèe must gift it)
3. Virgin
4. Rosary
5. Dove
6. Holy Family
7. Sacred Heart of Jesus
8. Light (it can be an adorned candle)
9. Seamstress box (scissors, needles, threads, tape to measure, bellboys, etc.)
10. Plant (of preference that is natural and that this in flowerpot)
11. Medicine kit (one fills of ma indispensable)
12. Saltshakers
13. Piggy bank.
14. Key (it carries keys has of wood and blacksmith shop)
15. Tool box (box with hammer, nails, tape, screws, etc.)
16. Rose (preferably a natural one and it is called on to give to the fiancè)
The fiancès firstly greet the guests, and give thanks to them all for being here today. Their names are then said (name of the fiancès). After finishing with the welcome the following is read:
We have met today with the purpose of celebrating a very important event: ________________________ and _______________________ (Name of Fiancèe and Fiancé) have been called by Christ to the life of marriage and to begin a new stage of their lives. Ever since their parents conceived them, they have been called several times to an overcoming greater obstacle every time. First belong to the family of God by the Baptism, then witnesses of Christ by the Confirmation and then members of a community by the Holy Eucharist. The love of __________________ and ___________________ is a new call to this union that will constitute a new home in a community of LOVE AND RESPONSIBILITY. This fills us with joy and happiness. Our hopes are amounted in you, wishing you that this marriage is always an image of the love from CHRIST to the church. God wanted that the man lived in society so that he formed the great human family. For that reason this couple is united to form a new family to give to God new children to serve him. LOVE. Thanks to the sacrament and the marriage, may God always be present to help them in the efforts they make to conserve their marriage and love. That they do not forget to make the center of their lives to GOD. All perfect marriages are symbolized by a triangle; the husband, the wife, and GOD. If you remember this, you will have in your thought the presence of GOD at every moment of your lives, and never you must fear to the future. May Christ reign not only in their hearts, but that they also have a space for his Mother, the Virgen, in whom he is going to be in its house. Remember: with GOD in our lives everything is possible; those that walk of their hand will find happiness in their marriage and life.
Readings:
Genesis I vesicles 1-2
Genesis II vesicles 18-24
Mateo 19 vesicle 4-6
Colosenses 3 versicle 18-19
Songs: That they speak according to the occasion, like which we will give them next:
IF I DO NOT HAVE LOVE
IF I DO NOT HAVE LOVE,
I NOTHING AM LORD IF I DO NOT HAVE LOVE,
I NOTHING AM LORD
LOVE IS COMPREHENSIVE,
LOVE DOES NOT HAVE ENVIES,
LOVE DOES NOT LOOK FOR IF I DO NOT HAVE LOVE,
I NOTHING AM LORD IF I DO NOT HAVE LOVE,
I NOTHING AM LORD
LOVE NEVER IS IRRITATED,
LOVE IS NOT DISCOURTEOUS
LOVE IS NOT SELFISH,
IF I DO NOT HAVE LOVE,
I NOTHING AM LORD IF I DO NOT HAVE LOVE,
LOVE FORGIVES EVERYTHING,
LOVE IS CHARITY, IS NOT GLAD OF UNJUST,
THE SINGLE THING ENJOYS IN HIM TRUTH IF I DO NOT HAVE LOVE,
I NOTHING AM LORD IF I DO NOT HAVE LOVE,
LOVE SUPPORTS EVERYTHING,
LOVE ALL CREATES, LOVE ALL WAITS FOR,
LOVE IS ALWAYS FAITHFUL IF
I DO NOT HAVE LOVE,
I NOTHING AM LORD IF I DO NOT HAVE LOVE,
We will continue with the delivery of gifts which take a message for the life which they will undertake. Observation: the fiancès must be standing up when they began to receive their gifts.
1. CRUCIFX: The mother of the fiancè is standing up and says the following thing: Why speak of the cross? Because there is a very direct union between the sacrifice and the union of the spouses, as much in one as in another, this represents the greatest sacrifice of love. We frequently see crucifixes, we signal the cross, but never are we touched with what this represents. Without a doubt this test for love. Jesus says to us. ” The greater test of love is to give the life by which it is loved”. For that reason the Cross, is the greatest test of love that it has ever existed and that it will ever exist in this world. Remember when you see this crucifix that its love fortifies and lasts all the life. That the God blesses them to both always. When finished reading she gives the Christ to the fiancès.
2. BIBLE: The mother of the fiancèe is standing up and says the following: This book that I give to them, contains the word of God, It will serve them as a guide, follow it and you will be sure that you never mistake your way. Christ is the way, the truth and the life. The reading of the Bible must be engaged in a dialog of its souls with God. This bible will accompany the reading by the prayer. When you read the divine word, it is God that speaks with you. Christ said, when you pray, you are speaking with God. You engage in a dialog: the reading of the Bible and prayer. Christ said: there (when two or three meet in my name there I will be). Be used to pray together. Follow always the divine word of the love of God and thus will be forgiven, to be sure that never make mistakes in any way. Maintain a life of obedience to the will of our God Father and thus the shades of sadness will not appear in your married life. But that on the contrary, they live its relationship totally accompanied by Jesus and will always feel blessed by its presence. Its love and its loving hand will guide you by the path of happiness, because Christ is the way, the truth, and the life.
3. VIRGIN: The Virgin is model of wife and Mother, nobody like her to give us a better example. Trust her with your married life. To Mary our Mother in heaven tell her your needs, so that their judgment is straight like the one of her, who always knew what to say when it was for love. Both together they should reach out to Mary, to ask for its aid. In its home always they have at sight the immaculate image of the Virgin Mary.
4. ROSARY: The rosary has five mysteries and fifty Holy Marys. When in their marriage problems appear and The Lord sends a test to them, take the rosary and pray, you will see your fingers cross its beads and their lips offer to God, by means of Mary, their prayer, with your souls will flood with peace of the only peace you can find in the arms of our Holy mother of God. Possibly the problem does not disappear absolutely, but the power of the Saint Rosary, will strength en your values and ease those difficult moments. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us ...
5. PLANT: Love is something delicate, like this plant. This plant will need water, and care to survive, and to keep clear the plagues from time to time. The same happens with the love, you must take care of it the same way you care for a plant. Give it affection and try avoiding everything it dislikes. Clear the small plagues of the bad companies that can kill their love and fill their marriage day to day with understanding and the affection.
6. MEDICINE KIT: Headaches, cut, burns, etc., are frequent in all the homes, they are symptoms that we are alive, of which we also work and of which we are effective, but of which sometimes accidents take place. In this medicine kit, you will find what is needed for first aid; remember that, often you will have to be nurses, doctors, and even healers. This medicine kit will serve you to cure the wounds, so that they do not become infected, because if they become infected they can arrive at one serious disease. It is necessary to understand, to look for the remedy for the difficulties. It is necessary to recognize our faults. Sometimes of the ability that they have to use an aspirin in time, to avoid a misfortune. Learning to see with the eyes of the soul the important things and to give a sufficient dose of love, understanding discipline, force and tenderness, when they are necessary. Remember that sometimes, to be able to cure it is necessary to cause much pain, but that pain can give peace, health, serenity and increase its love. Keep handy an Alka-Seltzer, for when you toast for every anniversary, you both wish another year of love.
7. THE ROSE: You will be like this select, beautiful and full rose of grace that it perfumed and cheered. Simultaneously she is delicate and simple as it opens its leaves to receive and to reflect the rays of the sun that will be those of Christ in your Home. I have cleared the thorns of this rose, that in spite of its beauty, if not taken with care, it can hurt. I request to God that you never find a thorn in the treatment you will receive from me and your new family, but if unfortunately an inopportune thorn should appear in the way, as well as it clears the thorns of this rose, I will try to vanish with love, any problems that you could have and I hope that this never happens. I hope you can can find next to me all the happiness which you deserve and receive from me a kiss and a strong hug of welcome from each member of my family that from today also is yours. May God bless you and us.
In this small prayer called the prayer of the Spouses it has intentions similar to which previously we have expressed to you with all our gifts and good wishes although said in different form. Nevertheless, in anyone of the forms one communicates in essence the same ideas to us, and is that to pray, pair to communicate to us with God, exists infinity of ways: The special events, Our life of every day, The people who surround to us, The objects that we use, The reading of the life, or Reflection of a prayer. Through them we can find the reason to pray.
All are ways to find us with God. Dear God help them establish a continuous communication channel with you and make of their life of marriage a complete prayer.
PRAYER OF THE SPOUSES
Make our home a place full of your Love
Let it be no sadness because you will always bless us
That there be no hate so you can give us forgiveness
That there be no abandonment because you are with us
That we march towards you in our daily lives
That we make love one more excuse to love you more
That each morning is one more day of delivery and sacrifice
That every night finds us with more love of spouses
That we comfort each other with mutual consolation
God make our lives that you joined together a page full of you
That the great day to go to your encounter, you find us united for always in you.
Amen
When finished with this prayer congratulate the fiancés and wish them much happiness. If some of the guests wish to give some advice to the fiancés, this will be the moment. Later one thanks to all the guests for all the gifts. Finally ending with a holly Father and Holy Mary forming a circle holding hands to pray a Holy Mary and the blessing with this brief prayer is requested:
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